Tricky Treats

Tricky Treats

Hannah Clemons, Contributor

Dressing up in costumes, going around door-to-door to terrifyingly decorated houses, and declaring “Trick-or-treat!” as a demand for candy is one of Halloween’s most popular traditions. You’re given chocolates, gummies, sour candies, etc. By the end of the spOoOoky night, you have a plastic jack o’lantern full of candy collected from the most horrific of houses. However, it may be full, but not all of it is the good stuff. Cheap, gross, and sadly common candy is constantly passed out to the trick-or-treaters. They’re no treats; they’re tricks. Behold, the true horror of Halloween (besides the following dental appointments): loser candy.

Black licorice will never have any hope for moving away from the worst ranking… ever! It really needs to tone it down with the glycyrrhizin, the natural sweetener of the licorice root, or just fade away from existence.

Good & Plenty took me by surprise one day. It looked good and there was plenty, so I made the mistake of eating several at once. Thankfully, I forgot the name and face of whoever gave me the licorice in disguise. Fun fact: Good & Plenty is the oldest candy brand in the USA by being first produced in 1893 in Philadelphia. 

Tootsie Rolls are my worst enemies and that says a lot. I always find these taking the place of candies I love. These “chocolate-flavored” taffies taste more like… I’m scared because I have no idea. Though, I have respect for them because they somehow saved the First Marine Division.

Mary Janes, an old-fashioned candy, and peanut butter kisses are both made up of molasses and peanut butter. I’ve never had either one, and I think they sound delicious, but the trick-or-treaters hate them. 

Wax coke bottles (Nik-L-Nip) are small bottle-shaped wax containers with sweet fruit-flavored syrup inside. You bite off the wax cap, drink a small quantity of the “soda”, and chew the remaining wax like gum (don’t swallow). Sounds like a fun concept, but for most, it’s just disregarded out of disinterest. Fun fact: Nik-L-Nips Wax bottles were invented during the time of prohibition.

Necco Wafers and Smarties, and I’m surprised by this, are hated by their chalky sugar tablet textures and flavors. Smarties are the reason why I’m smart. This is undeserved hate, people.

Circus Peanuts are a light orange/peachy color, banana-flavored, and peanut-shaped marshmallow candy. According to their producers, Circus Peanuts are very difficult to make because they’re requiring specific moisture conditions. A ton of effort put into a piece of crap.

Candy Corn is either hated or loved. These tri-colored pure sugar cones may be popular, but are commonly hated for their waxy yet crumbly texture and sickenly sweet taste. Honestly, I love them.

There are many other candies hated by the majority, but these were the most hated for Halloween. My personal least favorite? Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Call me insane… I dare you.